The Best Kind of Fun Requires Work
Being sanguine is NOT a character trait that comes easily to me. In fact, I have discovered that the state of unhappiness and melancholy is much easier to maintain. I think that some people are even addicted to the attention and drama it affords them.
But having a happy, contented, or carefree attitude is something I have fought for since I was a teenager but have desperately struggled to maintain for any length of time. It is a constant battle I wage to take my thoughts captive and make them obedient to Christ, though I am good at reminding my children to entertain such notions.
Types of Fun
Oddly, my role in the family is officially, “Vice President of Fun.” It is one I take quite seriously. Yet, it is one that requires a lot of work. I have discovered that the BEST kind of fun requires work. Doesn’t that seem ironic?
For example, recently we hosted what we call a CONTREAT for 60 people in the Wise House Oils community. (Have you seen our new website?)
It. Was. A. Lot. Of. Work.
Yet it was so rewarding, tons of fun, and the personal relationships were amazing. Not to mention, we planned it as a family — which was a personal highlight for me.
The Best Kind of Fun Requires Work
After reading Gretchen Rubin’s book, The Happiness Project, I unearthed the credibility to back what I knew: the best kind of fun requires work. According to Rubin, fun falls into three different categories:
- Challenging Fun — while the most rewarding it requires time, energy, errands, cleaning the house, and a team spirit to prepare
- Accommodating Fun — this looks like a trip to the playground or a movie, but involved coordinating schedules and making concessions to the individuals involved because not everyone likes the same restaurants, being out late, or is picky about the movie they watch
- Relaxing Fun — this requires absolutely no skills whatsoever beyond holding a remote or escaping into a good book
Gretchen Rubin further enlightened me by stating that
Research shows that challenging fun and accommodation fun, over the long term, bring more happiness, because they’re sources of the elements that make people happiest: strong personal bonds, mastery, and atmosphere of growth. Relaxing fun tends to be passive — by design. So if relaxing fun is the least kind of fun, why is watching TV so popular? Because although we get more out of challenging fun and accommodating fun, we must also put more into it. It takes energy and forethought. (The Happiness Project, p. 135)
That Explains Everything
Knowing this, I now know why when my kids ask to make cookies, have a tea party, build a fort, go to the Zoo, or host a party — I inwardly grown. Yet, I find myself agreeing that this is a good idea. It will just require work. But because I know that the reward is high, I find myself planning epic events. That explains everything.
The high from a good party or a messy kitchen is worth it because of the fun experienced and the bonding memories created.
And I know that I will once again, host a CONTREAT, throw that birthday party, teach an essential oil class, invite friends over for dinner, and plan a family vacation.
But I know that I’ll also watch Poldark, throw on a good Christmas movie, stay up late, and savor some vacation reading.